Coping with Suicide Loss

Resources for Suicide Loss Survivors - Took Kit - The loss of a loved one by suicide is often shocking, painful and unexpected. The grief that ensues can be intense, complex, and long term. Grief work is an extremely individual and unique process; each person will experience it in their own way and at their own pace.

Support Group

Suicide Loss Survivor Support Groups – Call (831) 459-9373 (Offered online only for people over the age of 18.)

Resources for Parents/Caregivers

• Children, Teens and Suicide Loss
• Suicide Prevention: A Resource for Parents

Online Website Resources

• suicidepreventionlifeline.org
• https://allianceofhope.org/
• https://sprc.org/tools/resources-survivors-suicide-loss/
• suicidology.org/resources/community-support-resources/
• A Manager's Guide to Suicide Postvention in the Workplace
• After a Suicide: A Toolkit for Schools
• Help and Support After Suicide - Information and resources to promote healing

• Know you can survive; you may not think so, but you can.
• Struggle with “why” it happened until you no longer need to know “why” or until YOU are satisfied with partial answers.
• Know you may feel overwhelmed by the intensity of your feelings but that all your feelings are normal.
• Anger, guilt, confusion, forgetfulness are common responses. You are not crazy, you are in mourning.
• Be aware you may feel appropriate anger at the person, at the world, at God, at yourself. It’s okay to express it.
• You may feel guilty for what you think you did or did not do. Guilt can turn into regret, through forgiveness.
• Having suicidal thoughts is common. It does not mean that you will act on those thoughts.
• Remember to take one moment or one day at a time.
• Find a good listener with whom to share. Call someone if you need to talk.
• Don’t be afraid to cry. Tears are healing.
• Give yourself time to heal.
• Remember, the choice was not yours. No one is the sole influence on another’s life.
• Expect setbacks. If emotions return like a tidal wave, you may only be experiencing a remnant of grief, an unfinished piece.

• Try to put off major decisions.
• Give yourself permission to get professional help.
• Be aware of the pain in your family and friends.
• Be patient with yourself and others who may not understand.
• Set your own limits and learn to say no.
• Steer clear of people who want to tell you what or how to feel.
• Know that there are support groups that can be helpful, such as Compassionate Friends or Survivors of Suicide groups. If not, ask a professional to start one.
• Call on your personal faith to help you through.
• It is common to experience physical reaction to your grief, e.g. headaches, loss of appetite, inability to sleep.
• The willingness to laugh with other and at yourself is healing.
• Wear out your questions, anger, guilt, or other feelings until you can let them go. Letting go doesn’t mean forgetting.
• Know that you will never be the same again, but you can survive and even go beyond just surviving.